Lost in the Trees, Until I See the Forest

Sometimes I feel like I’m going through the motions. The days bleed together, I can get caught up in my shuffle. Half in half out of my body. When I exhaust this, or I pick up enough of myself to remember, I go to my inner elevator, literally, and I press the button for the top floor. I rise as far as I possibly can. Dis-identifying from the character we call Jen, and all she carries...

I find my throne, where I can see the entire forest, no longer bogged down by the trees. AKA the thoughts and feelings that seemingly barricade me from my spirit, my peace, my power. From here it’s much easier to breathe, to find my heart, to be in my body. To love the one who gets lost in the trees. I do this on repeat. Toggling between worlds. Repeatedly diving down, only to rise higher, more in tact. Every time more in command of my throne. My will more connected to my spirit.

Self actualization, enlightenment, embodiment, wholeness, it’s not a one stop shop. It’s a process with cycles beyond our control. Funny though, the more I surrender control, the more I can wield my vehicle.
Although I know this dance intimately, I still, when the dark days are long, I still fear that the light is gone forever. Even when I know this is impossible. What falls...must rise, just as much as, what rises also falls. I remember again and again…and again. Embracing the dance and escaping the game.